Thursday, December 11, 2008

What to Think About While Peeling Oranges


I think about how exciting/dangerous it would be to discovering oranges and apples and bananas and all sorts of vegetables and fruits for the first time. How many times do you think it took him/her to stop eating the orange rinds and just peal them off? Or how about, if he/she discovered apples after that, do you think they tried pealing them first? How about when they tried to eat the potato without cooking it? Ugh. How about the first person to stumble upon a pumpkin and ask "what the fuck is zat?" And yes, ancient man talks exactly like the Germans from Beerfest. In a time when every fun and exciting thing has already been discovered, how cool would it be to go back and watch someone eating strawberries for the first time? Imagine how happy they'd be when they realize how good they taste!

So yes, this is what I was thinking about while sitting as my desk peeling an orange this morning. And how wonderfully long my hands would smell like orange. And that orange is a fruit AND a color. And...

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

And what about whoever discovered olives?

BLaZE said...

Well, we already know the first person to try the apple was Eve. So you don't have to worry about her trying to peel the rind off.

(you honostly brought this on yourself with all that he/she crap. Just say they!)

Epic Gecko said...

I've consistently wondered who discovered that tobacco is a narcotic. I just imagine random people picking up plants, burning them and seeing if inhaling them does anything.

Maybe someone's roof caught on fire in a lightning storm and everyone's all "Hey, Running-with-Scissors' burning house makes me feel pretty good..." And then Running-with-Scissors never had a house anymore, because his tribesmen would immediately raze his home for tobacco highs whenever he built a new one.

Isabel said...

hahaha I can't wait until I get to think about things like this at work...and THEN tell the world about my ponderings...

You still crack me up, nerd.

What about the people who decided that if you push on the udders of a cow, milk would come out? And who was the first person to taste that...kinda weird! I'm sure glad I wasn't that guy.